Jeffery Saunders

Coping With Christchurch’s Earthquakes

It may sound harsh to say this, but some people cope better with earthquakes than others. The same applies to all disasters. Here are some self-help tips as to how to live your life day by day so that when disaster strikes, you are prepared for the worst ... Read >

Marital relationship needs, love and our motivation to improve

1. When people see others as being different they often conclude "some thing's wrong with you", or "some thing's wrong with me", or "why don't you get your act together and change", and so on. As we will see, this is flawed thinking. 2. We are attracted... Read >

How couples can avoid divorce

Relationship, couples and marriage help comes in the form of insight into how successful partnerships work. Once you know the map, you can traverse the territory. There are several key insights that couples must have before they can be assured of a goo... Read >

The 12 Choices leading to love of self

The pebble in the brook secretly thinks itself a precious stone. Japanese proverb Choice 1: Take full responsibility for loving yourself. If you are seeking to feel better as a result of others loving you, then you are handing them both your power a... Read >

Escape from depressive thinking?

Bring personal power and mental health back into your life. Take full control of your monkey mind, especially when it heads off into a fog, mist or bog because worry and anxious thinking has taken over. Research by Martin Seligman (the bees knees when i... Read >

Your Mental Health New Year's Resolution

The biggest problem most people will have this New Year, is that they will slip into old mental habits. They will get caught in ruminating, catastrophizing, being pessimistic, doubting self, beating up self; in all, doing just too much anxious and depress... Read >

Manage your mind, manage your feelings

A calm attitude preserved at all times bespeaks a man of culture. Buddhist saying Unwanted emotions are caused by unhelpful perspectives and thoughts. That's where it all begins. As long as the negative thoughts persist, so will the emotions to which... Read >

Emotionally illiterate man's life heads downhill

(The) tendency to avoid problems and the emotional suffering inherent in them is the primary basis of all human mental illness. M. Scott Peck, in The Road Less Traveled Nigel castigated his estranged wife endlessly during their twenty-year marriage b... Read >

Emotional intelligence leads to a happier life

Those who feel more, succeed more. Jeff Saunders The more emotionally intelligent (often termed EQ) amongst us do better in life than those who are not. Those who are in touch with their feelings and emotions, and who are able to make balanced decisio... Read >

What is personal power?

A man is no more than the sum of his personal power. Carlos Castaneda, Journey to Ixtlan, Personal power is something few people have very much of, largely because they mismanage the energies of their mind. And many others wouldn't want personal power... Read >

Losers cultuvate poor relationships

We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us. Marcel Proust We are born Winners. We are trained to be Losers. Losers immerse themselves in the Control Drama Triangle, in which they... Read >

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for the truth; and truth rewarded me. Simone de Beauvoir Proactively changing your life may push you to the edge of your comfort zone. It is not easy to drop old friends, give u... Read >

Quake Care

Tired and listless? Does walking feel like dragging yourself through deep mud? Constantly exhausted, and desperately trying to move from first gear into fourth, while your body is complaining about being in any gear at all? Maybe you're fractious, over-re... Read >

Take charge. Make your life happen

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers To develop your true potential you must stop reacting and start being proactive in order to create both your outer reality and inner reality experiences. Being... Read >

Distorted minds are commonplace

It isn't the way the world is that determines our experience of it, but rather our interpretation of it. If our interpretations are unhelpful or inaccurate, this will influence the quality of our life experiences.2 Consider for a moment someone who believ... Read >